Random Rantings...

To be able to communicate and to express your views in writing is an integral part of one's development. Of late, I have been experiencing problems on both fronts. Neither am I able to talk freely nor have I been able to write, without feeling insecure about spellings and grammatical errors. I've become painfully aware that I had more command over the language as a twelve year old than I do now.

When I come to think of it, I cannot figure out when it all started. Till Class 12th, I could only interact in English and the thought of speaking Hindi, scared me out of my wits. I did study Hindi, but then, it is not my mother tongue. Anyway, I entered college, and by the time I graduated, I spoke more Hindi than my friends. After college, I spent a year in the hospitals in Mumbai, and as it all stands now I can neither speak good English nor Hindi. My pronunciation is an obtuse blend of Hindi, English and Marathi, with a hint of Kannada, served with “I-Just-Ran-Away-From-A-Mental-Hospital” look on my face.

Thus it’ll be in my best interest to stick to writing till I no longer give the impression of being a raving lunatic.

I always enjoyed writing, but never wrote so much to be labeled a writer. I found it easier to express myself in writing than through oral communication. Earlier I could write at will, about anything... anyone. Now it takes me half an hour to link words to come up with a sane sentence.

Yesterday I wanted to write a few good words for a friend, who means the world to me. I sat up all night, only to realize that I could just come up with “She is phenomenal!!” I can understand when people might try to convince me that maybe my friend is so phenomenal that it is tough to find words for her. Vehemently as I may agree, I also know I was capable of having come up with a lot more than that for someone whom you have known for years.

Maybe I’ve gone from being bad to worse, because of my inability to engage in a conversation which actually calls for a reasonable utilization of the gray matter. While everyone is busy expending their brains now, I’m actually saving the little I have been blessed with, for old age. It would be all the more better, if I can be granted a fixed interest for saving my brains for n number of years. Maybe by the time I die, my name will go down the history books as the “Brainiest Man”.

I know many of you will not agree with my theory right now, but am sure when all of us will be enroute to becoming kids once again; I will be the only one to be called a whiz-kid!!